Thou Shalt Not's For Horse Owners
1. I am the Lord, thy God, and Thou shalt not taketh My name in vain.
(Rememberest that when thee shouteth, "Oh, my God!" in extreme anguish and frustration, thee receiveth My attention. Thou mayest NOT plead "mitigating circumstances!"
(Rememberest thou also that running through a combination of healthy, natural muck liberally laced with animal residue is but My beauty preparations! Yea, tho' thou goeth face first into the Holy mixture, thou shalt NOT complain, for thou art under My care. Thinketh thou not that mud packs are a "natural herbal beauty aid" and sold for millions? Thinketh thou not that animal residue beth a superior hair conditioner to that which thee spendeth thy hard earned cash on, whilest scorning My concoction available within feet of thy front door for free?
(Rememberest thou also that thee needeth to spend twenty minutes with thy heart at an elevated level two to three times a week to reduce thy cholesterol level and reduceth thy risk of heart attack caused from over-indulging thyself in the bounty with which I have provided thee. Thy slothful behavior have broughteth extreme measures upon thyself for not exercising regularly.
(When thee runeth in 2-7" of My Holy mixture with thy arms extended and a bucket in one hand, whilst shouting in loud measure, thee receiveth maximum benefit. Thinketh also that hou wilt gaineth more thigh muscle if the consistency beth sticky rather than gooey. When the Holy mixture sucketh thy boots off and thee continueth barefoot, perhaps thy FEET shall also becometh less wrinkled.
(Thinketh thou strongly on all that I have relateth to thee and speaketh with me again tomorrow morning.)
Thus spake the Lord, thy God, in answer to thy suplications.
Very clever, Sandy. You need to keep adding to those "Thou shalt nots".
Someone remarked to me many years ago that your vocbulary changed with the number of horses you had in your care. They didn't say it improved though
! Linda K. Prints Charming Farm, Ore.
Thinketh me that it be a bit thicke. Nevermindeth, howsomever, the other sites delighteth me.
Martieth Marti Grimes Marti's Pintos & Arabians, TX
(formerly Tackitts Pintos & Arabians - since 1972)Oh, I don't know, Marty. You live in a dry climate, no? You have probably not had your boots sucked off your feet by the muck on a regular basis. True, it did not happen the morning I wrote the piece, but it got one LOOSE. And I did not FALL in it, that particular morning, but did go in backwards on ice once, and had to walk out of a boot, go get a pitchfork and unbury it a bit before I could pull it out.
When I showed it to one of the school secretaries the morning I wrote it, she commented immediately that her sixth grade son had walked out of his boots in new socks and just kept on going, leaving the boots there. She said she threw the socks away rather than try to wash them.
I was treating Lucretia with some medicine that required a 3cc dose morning and night. That particular morning, we had flash flood warnings out, and when I finished my shower, I went outside with the medicine in my hand and promptly got a second shower. It quickly subsided, then I spent 20 minutes trying to get to Lucretia in the muck.
She didn't really run off, but when I'd position the syringe, she'd just sort of wade to another pile of hay , and I'd have to follow her. Eventually she gave up her rambling (I was just glad to see her feeling better!) and I got it into her.
On the way back up the hill, the herd came with me to the electric wire. When it began to rain, someone spun around and the whole group took off, flinging bits into the air, which got in my hair and on the side of my face. I got totally drenched, as well, so I took yet another shower before school. Not bad -- two inside showers and two outside showers before 7:30 am...
Anyone can add comments on the Ara/Pinto Market Newsletter Message Board on the topics listed.
Please type the column name in the RE: line.Horses for sale/trade/at stud go in the Horse Listing section, which is NOT a free listing. Posts offering horses for sale/trade/at stud will be removed or altered into informational posts about the animals in question.
Tired of Horsin' Around? Relax with Stories
site was prepared by the
Slap, Dash, Paste Production Company.
Participles dangled while you wait.
Web Sites,Videos of our stock,
and Video Productions from your VHS footage
prepared within a calendar year.
As of 4/14/01: